Dear Fi,
As you probably already have noticed I have huge issues with timing lately. Somehow my life has too many deadlines at the same time... and the changes I am undergoing right now are more stressful than I could have predicted. But I already whined to you in my countless e-mails, so I won’t repeat myself here again.
I’m so glad that you are back. I love your Zentangle!!! At first I thought that you cut them out of paper. That would be great! For me they look more like very cool and freehanded prints rather then just scribbling and doodling on paper. Totally bold! So, maybe we should switch to Weekly Zentangle ha, ha. Although, knowing me and my timing it probably wouldn't be weekly... ha, ha.
So the story for this step goes like this:
I think that if I had enough time to think about what I wanted to do (pre-planning ha, ha) for my 36th step I would have had more success with posting on Tuesday. However, on Tuesday I found myself undecided, tired, stressed, and totally empty.
I tried to sketch something. I had a totally different idea for this post. I was fascinated by falling leaves. I took many pictures of golden leaves lying on the grass, on the asphalt, dancing in the air, and resting in my hand. These pictures were the inspiration for my project. I imagined how I will combine them with my post etc. and that was all I could do on Tuesday.
Yesterday I decided to do something, anything, whatever... I just wanted to “have it done”. I painted a page in my Moleskine watercolour sketchbook in ivory. I thought about using only white, ivory, and cream colours, papers, paints and ribbons. However, while searching for materials, I found the leftovers from the tiny cabinet project I did and because it was just easier and faster to use what I already had I changed my mind about using the monochromatic palette. I’m actually happy that I changed the original idea because later on when I scanned the image I found out that it will probably be impossible to see the different shades of white, ivory and cream very well. Even this piece is failing to show that distinction :( Maybe a camera would record it better? Too late to check it now ha, ha ;)
So, I finished my collage yesterday, but when I thought about writing a post I just knew it won’t happen. I didn’t feel good about it, but I needed to use my resources wisely. Since I started to work I just don’t have the same time and energy to stay up late at night. Besides Tuesdays are actually the most stressful days for me. So, Thursday it is, and I’m finally posting...Hope you will forgive me (AGAIN!!!) and hope you feel much much better right now My Dear :*
I’m sending you lots of love and the healing vibrations :*
Sylvia
Hello love!
ReplyDeleteThank you for your healing vibrations! :-) They worked very well - my cold's completely gone, yipee!
I had to laugh yesterday, when I finally uploaded my post... and came across this one of yours! I'd forgotten that you had uploaded it, so it was a lovely surprise.
I'd love to have seen your 'white' creation, although, I know what you mean about the white and cream not scanning well. I think that would have been the last straw for you - if you'd actually managed to complete it, despite being tired and busy, but then couldn't get a picture of it to post! I'd have a complete meltdown if it was me! ha ha ha! :-)
I can't stop laughing about how we keep trying to fit 52 Steps in, yet the pair of us at the moment don't appear to have much time. All I can keep saying to you (and to myself as well!) is, "don't stress about 52 Steps, that was never the point! It's supposed to be fun!"... and yet each week, I stress and rush to post and never have time to post exactly what I wanted and worse, I'm discovering, don't even PLAN what I'm going to post! It feels very fly by the seat of my pants at the moment. Everything in my life does! Roll on November. Then, I'm introducing a ban on guests until Christmas, so I can catch up with all I need to do! :-))))
Honestly, Sylwi, you have so much on your plate right now, please don't worry about the Tuesday deadlines. I went through exactly the same thought process as you. I used to leave it till Tuesday to decide what to do, then get really cross at myself when I came up short. Then, I decided to plan it over the weekend... but soon, I found that 52 Steps was taking over my entire thought bank for the week - I was posting on a Tuesday and immediately after, beginning to worry about the next week. I knew my enthusiasm for 52 was never going to last if I continued like that, so at the mo, I decide what to do on a Monday (and try to start it on a Mon too - but never do!) :-))))
We've only got 15 steps left, if that makes it any better? The stress won't last forever! :-) Just until the beginning of next year! ;-P ha ha! OKay, I know that comment wouldn't make you feel better when you're so busy and need a solution right now. I don't know what to suggest. Just post what you can, when you can. This is a good lesson for both of us on being 'unperfectionists'. ;-)))
Maybe you could use this space and the last 15 posts as a scrapbook/notebook for ideas. So, you don't have to post a finished piece of artwork, just sketches, or words drawn on a sheet... nothing needs to be completed...
Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up about missing the Tuesday deadlines. It will kill your creativity and you'll lose your passion for your art and craft. Please take it easy on yourself. This space is supposed to be a safe haven - a place to stretch our legs without fear of judgement... and that includes our own judgement, remember! :-)))
Lots of love. I'll write soon. It's crazy busy here this week too. All I want to do is find a dark room where I can hide under the bed for a week and catch up on some sleep! ;-)
Fi
xx