Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Step Nineteen: Stones and circles...

Dear Fi,

Stones again. I really like the pictures above. Very symbolic, very at the right moment for me. It is funny, because the symbolism of these two pictures is really stronger now than when I arranged the stones to photograph them. I didn’t put a lot thought into it, it was a natural, simple, and rather quick movement he, he.

I am currently taking a class about group work. I am also involved in some group work and training outside of the University (working with a Wise Woman again!). Somehow stones always bring the image of a circle, and the circle represents the connection between people sharing time/space together. Sacred circles... especially women’s circles.

The wild flowers, brought home by my three and half year old daughter, and placed in my favourite wine glass are so beautiful yet so simple. At first I though that they symbolize a leader. An authentic, charismatic, visionary, compassionate person. A living inspiration. When people approach a leader like this, they naturally form a circle around her, they want to be close, and to follow her. But then I understood that the flowers are so different from the stones, they are not the same kind. I also thought that a true leader would rather sit in the circle together with other women, instead of putting herself in the centre.

So I decided that these flowers symbolize a higher power, universe, great spirit, goddess, holiness, consciousness, energy, a whole... The list goes on but I will stop here Dear Fi, because I got carried away ha, ha. {And if I don’t stop now I will write my master thesis on the power of women’s circles, creativity, and spirituality. Actually... I might do this one day when I get bored and have lots of free time ha, ha - so probably never}.

Anyway, I cannot concentrate while writing this post. Lots of things are going on in my life right now. All amazingly good, and inspiring, I feel uplifted and I feel like I am on the right path, and I am so excited. However, the thing is, there is nothing concrete to share because all that is happening is happening on the inside, still in process, still hasn’t taken a form, still very raw.

OK, I will just try now to jump and quickly say a few words about my project, shall I?

First of all I thought I would be done with my project in an hour (haven’t I learned anything yet so far???). I prepared the stones yesterday, I found them, collected them, and washed them. I was ready to start painting them right after waking up. I didn’t need to choose colours I knew what colours I would use before even realizing that I would paint the stones. These stones are a gift for a special woman, and I had planned to get something done for her since January (BTW, no this is not the longest it has taken me to finish a project, so two years for your Kususama ball isn’t really that bad, trust me!).

Anyway, I digress again. The point is that I have had many ideas for this gift in the last couple of months, I even shared one with you in post number 6 and 7, where I talked about painting nine hearts for her. Honestly, I think I just wasn`t ready, not even busy, there were weeks I could simply do something and it would be done. But I didn`t wanted to have it done, I wanted to put my whole heart into it and I wanted this project to bring a “special kinds of feelings” he, he.  Did that sound weird? Not for me.

So, everything was prepared, I was ready and eager to paint... only to discover right after I started to paint that something strange happened to my eyes. The sad thing is, Dear Fi, that my eyes are getting older, and somehow I totally didn`t expect this to happen so soon. I just couldn’t see properly. This is why instead of painting these stones in a few hours it took me a half day to finish today’s project. And when I finally did, the sun disappeared and while taking the last pictures on my patio, it started to rain.


Now, to end it somehow ;)

1. I’m very happy with the end result, and yes lots of “special kinds of feelings” were floating above these stones today :) he, he

2. I need to IMMEDIATELY schedule an appointment to an optometrist!!!

3. Finally... this post totally sucks, I have no idea what I was writing about and what I actually wanted to say. It is a great example of “How NOT to write”. I’m in a hurry and in the middle of my spring session. So, besides all of the great things {I wish I knew how to put them into words today} I have some serious work to do tonight.




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