Step Thirty One: Finally, I'm back...

My Dear Fi,

First of all thank you for your patience with me!!! As you know my computer died on me and I was caught up in my school work for the last few weeks. I’m glad that you carried on and that you survived all the e-mails with my whining. We should both get a medal ;) Actually, I seriously considered making a medal for myself for today’s project.

Instead I’m coming back after two weeks of disappearance with a ten minute painting!!! This isn’t what I had planned for my “great come back”, but this is all that I was able to do. Surprisingly, I don’t feel guilty. Maybe because it was really fun to finally paint something without any special expectations.

I had other plans for today. The mentioned medal was one, I also thought about choosing one of my old projects which I promised myself to complete before the year ends, the other idea was to try something new. However, I noticed that all those ideas made me nervous and believe me Dear Fi being stressed is not what I wanted to do today.

Today was actually the first "lazy" day since I finished my course. After submitting my final assignment on Friday I couldn’t find a place for myself. On Saturday I scheduled my nose to be pierced, so I was nervous about how it will go (ha, ha). On Sunday I attended a great half-day workshop with Stuart and Carol Heller "The 90% Non-Verbal Factor". On Monday once again I tried to figure out “who am I?” and “what I really want to do with the time I have before starting my practicum and the next class?” However, I was so tired that I couldn’t answer these questions...

I have no idea how to interpret today’s piece... However, I feel some air and messy freedom caught up in there and this is what makes me smile. I don’t know why I am always surprised by the ability of this short process of creative expression to uplift my spirit. Haven’t I learn yet? So now, Dear Fi, I am seriously contemplating to use it daily and see what happens.

Love :*

Sylvia

P.S.
I feel like this post is one of my super ramblings. Please, forgive me! I couldn’t concentrate while writing this post... I think I need a really long break from writing ;)