Step Three: Clarity...

Dear Fi,

There were a few ideas I consider for my post today:

1. a surprise for a dear person, who has no idea that this blog exists (actually, I think that at this point nobody even knows that we are meeting here each Tuesday!)
2. a small piece for Patti Digh’s “call for artwork” I signed up for last year and it finally landed in my inbox two days ago!
3. a small tag with my word for 2010 which is {clarity} for Lis’ weekly reflection

As you see, I didn’t know that I would end up working with my “clarity” face. Ironically, in total opposition to what I have wrote under my picture I love the unknown but only the unknown of our Tuesdays ;)

Actually, I just realized that it is not in the opposition, it is exactly what I was writing about, a perfect example. Because the clarity I’m searching for is not about mental knowing, it is about inner knowing. About trusting the process (and myself). About listening. About being involved in the “now” to the point of forgetting/not needing to know “what’s next?”

...

In the end I’m happy that I unexpectedly created this altered photo of myself for myself. There is an old saying in Polish “the shoemaker always goes barefoot” (it has a different meaning than “the shoemaker’s son always goes barefoot”, it doesn’t involve neglecting a third person, the shoemaker is the one without the shoes). Wait a second Fi, where was I headed with all of this? The next time I cannot wait with writing until everybody in my house has fallen asleep, because my brain isn’t working properly at these hours, not in English, not in Polish, not at all! Anyway, the point was I’m the barefoot shoemaker and usually I don’t have the shoes I’m making... (now I do!)

Right now I’m dreaming about a hot bath with one of my favourite essential oils. But before I go I want to tell you something. The first thing I drew today was the inner eye on my forehead, then I added more eyes floating in the air. Later on I realized that even though my eye perfectly symbolizes the inner knowing and I drew it spontaneously, the floating eyes came to existence from the influence of another artist I discovered recently. I feel like these eyes belong to me, but the idea of floating eyes doesn’t. It is not mine and I’m clear about this. I just needed to say this.

So, Good Night - off to bath ;)

:*

Sylvia

P.S.
Look what I just found (almost in my tub!): “Sometimes surrender means giving up trying to understand and becoming comfortable with not knowing.” {Eckhart Tolle “Stillness Speaks”}